


If It Takes Forever

by wordbending



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Abandonment, F/F, One-Sided Relationship, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-11 23:58:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20554844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordbending/pseuds/wordbending
Summary: I will wait for youFor a thousand summersI will wait for you...





	If It Takes Forever

It’s so hard for you, not moving - harder than anything. You’re used to bouncing and flipping and wobbling and stretching, defying even physics herself to stop you from doing the impossible. Not moving goes against everything that makes you _you._

But when _Blue Diamond _and _Yellow Diamond _tell you to stand perfectly still, you do. After all, what else _could_ you do?

“Well, Pink, we know you don’t like being... alone,” says Blue’s voice. “And we’re so busy with our colonies... it’s just so difficult for us to be there all the time. You must understand.”

“I understand,” says Pink softly, and even though you can’t see her, you can tell she doesn’t.

“So Blue and I,” says Yellow, sounding bored with this entire affair, “decided to get you a plaything. A pet, of a sort. She should keep you... entertained.”

“For a little while, at least,” adds Blue, helpfully. “It’s only temporary.”

Yellow claps her hands. “Come out now.”

That’s your cue. Turning your legs into a huge spring and grabbing onto the sides of Blue and Yellow’s thrones, you rocket yourself out of your hiding place behind Blue’s throne and land in front of Pink. You know what you’re going to do next - you’re going to encircle her with your torso, grin at her, and say “It’s me, your new best friend, Spinel!”

You’ve _practiced _this.

But you take one look at her face and freeze.

She’s _the prettiest gosh darn thing you’ve ever seen._

Her eyes, her hair, her outfit, even her lips - you were only recently incubated, but it’s all unlike anything you’ve ever seen. It’s nothing like the murals and statues of the diamonds that are all over Homeworld. And it’s nothing like Blue’s distant sense of superiority or Yellow’s sneer of cold command.

For the first time in your life, without anyone telling you not to, you can’t move. You can only stare into Pink’s eyes, watching as she stares back.

“Gem!” barks Yellow. “Did we ask for a fool or a _fool?”_

“Oh, Yellow...” says Blue. “She’s probably just nervous...”

“Well, _get over it! _We don’t have all day!”

Having already heard horror stories of the Diamonds shattering disobedient gems, you snap to attention. You perform a series of cartwheels around Pink, watching as Pink frailly turns in a circle to try to track you. Once you’re behind her, you stretch over her head and land feet-first in front of her, flattening yourself against the ground and then rebounding back into position with your arms outstretched.

“It’s me, your new best friend, Spinel!”

Pink stares for a moment. You wonder if you’ve done something wrong.

But, then, she raises a hand to her mouth and giggles. The sound of it echoes through the room, before sinking into your form, bouncing through you until it settles into the very core of your gem.

And you know, at that very second, that there isn’t anything in the universe you wouldn’t do for her.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

You’re bouncing up and down as Pink Diamond - _your _Diamond - walks with you to the Warp Pad. You can’t stop your face from grinning even if you wanted to, and why would you want to, when everything is this _perfect?_

“Where are we going, my Diamond?” you ask, making the traditional Diamond salute.

Pink Diamond pauses, then turns to look at you. She’s frowning, an expression that makes your gem feel like it’s going to break in two. You don’t know what you did wrong until she takes your arms and uncurls them from the shape of the Diamond salute, shaking her head.

“M-my Diamond?” you offer. She shakes her head again, smiling sadly, and you give her a small, awkward grin. “Pink?”

Pink smiles and your grin widens until it covers half your face. She takes your hand and starts to walk onto the Warp Pad.

She stops when she realizes you haven’t moved at all. Instead, your arm is stretched between her hand and where you’re standing, hanging loose on the ground.

With a laugh, she pulls on your arm, and you bounce towards her like a missile, grinning all the way. As you collide with her, tying your arms around her chest, the warp activates and your laughing silhouettes disappear into the stars.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

The garden becomes the point where your life begins and ends. It’s your whole world, almost its own planet, reserved just for you and Pink.

Pink wants to learn all about how it works, and as she does, she wants to teach you all about it too. She learns to water the “plants” and “flowers” with a tool that looks far too small in her hand - you try to copy her by forming your body into the shape of a bowl and dumping water all over them, but apparently this is “drowning” them. You don’t know what that means, only that it’s bad somehow.

You wonder why she doesn’t just kiss the flowers - Pink’s ability to bring things to life by kissing them is well-known - and ask her why she doesn’t just make things easier for herself. She answers that she wants to learn how to do it the way it’s supposed to be done. The way people on her future colony would do it.

From Pink, and Pink only, that doesn’t sound so silly. In fact, you think, it makes perfect sense.

Gardening, though, quickly starts to feel boring to you. It’s always the same old thing over and over. One time, you shape yourself into a flower instead, standing on one foot and wrapping your arms in a circle around your head. She laughs and pours water on you, and you laugh even harder as you inflate your arms to cover your face. She laughs almost as hard in return.

You never want this to end.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

You could play with Pink for the rest of your existence, until your gem crumbles into dust. It never gets old for you. You think that it must never get old for Pink either, except that sometimes, she introduces you to something unexpected and new and then it’s like you’re meeting her for the first time.

One of the first thing she introduces you to is a little game she calls “singing.” It’s not much of a game - all you do is sit on your stomach and kick your legs while Pink reverberates her voice in a mournful song about how everything changes but stays the same. You don’t really understand it. You just know her voice makes you feel utterly safe, utterly happy, utterly _loved._

When she finishes singing, you inflate both your hands to be as big as the rest of you and clap uproariously. It makes her laugh, a soft chuckle, and you shamelessly grin.

Then she says it’s your turn to play.

“M-mine?” you say, your gaze flicking back and forth, your arms raised protectively to your gem.

She nods.

“Ah, what the heck,” you say, even though you have no idea what you’re doing and you’re sure you’ll screw it up and she’ll hate you and... “I’ll give it a whirl.”

You clap your hands together, look up towards the stars, and try to sing the same song Pink did.

Pink frowns.

Of course Pink wouldn’t like imitations, you realize. How could _your _voice measure up to _her’s?_

But you don’t know any other songs.

Well, in that case, you think, you’ll have to improvise.

You start to bounce to a steady, simple rhythm, raising yourself up and down on your knees. And you start to sing.

_Hey, hey, hey!_

_Who’s here today?_

_Why, I think_

_It’s got to be Pink_

_Golly gee! No way!_

You lower an invisible hat to her, then start waving your fists back and forth in front of yourself, all while still bouncing.

_Pink, the diamond’s shining star_

_Pink, known from anear and afar,_

_Pink, the crowning gem of them all!_

_Pink, who isn’t all that tall!_

Pink giggles. Grinning, you start to move towards her, leaning your upper torso towards her as if being pulled by something.

_But don’t you forget,_

_Because it’s a safe bet,_

_There’s her friend loyal and true..._

You strike a pose, arms and legs akimbo, thumb pointed towards your chest.

_That’s right! It’s me! Spinel!_

_The only member of her crew!_

You spin your torso around towards her before abruptly coming to a stop, reaching forward, and grabbing her hands. You pull on her arms and she stands to her full height, eclipsing you by far - you don’t hesitate to skip around her, your arms wrapping around her legs while she laughs and tries to keep her balance.

_Oh, what do I say about her? What do I say?_

_What would I do without her? What would I do?_

_Would she play games without me? What would she play?_

_Did I think, all this time, you won’t get what I feel for you?_

She says your name suddenly and you stop singing, reeling in your arms and snapping back in front of her like a rubber string that’s been pulled taut and then released.

“Pink?” you say quietly, staring up into her eyes.

She crouches down to something closer to your height, puts a hand on your cheek, and caresses it. Your gem starts to feel strange - unstable, as if it’s resonating with a strange, alien frequency.

She says something to you, but you don’t hear it. You only see her lips move. What you do hear is when she tells you to keep singing.

And you’re more than happy to do that, if it means that she’ll ever touch you in that way again.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

Soon after singing comes dancing. Dancing comes much more naturally to you - it’s all frenetic, off-the-wall energy, striking poses, wiggling and jiggling until you’re too tired to stand. Your flexibility only makes it that much more fun - it’s not really that much different from all the messing around you normally do with Pink.

But Pink explains that dancing isn’t so easy for her. Dancing the way Diamonds do is so stiff and formal and boring. What she wants to learn is how to dance like _you._

The way she says that nearly makes you lose your form. It takes every bit of self-control you have not to salute. Or, if you’d ever admit it, to hug her.

You start off with a simple move, raising yourself up and down as if moving to an unheard melody. Pink copies you, although she looks much more awkward doing it - her legs are much longer than yours.

You start waving your arms to and fro in front of your chest as if you’re giving someone the old one-two. Pink laughs - she always laughs when you do that - and does the same.

You wiggle your hips in countermeasure. She wiggles back.

Then you introduce something more complicated - you start to do a complex-looking dance with your legs, the opposite of what you’re already doing with your arms. You swing one leg in front of the other in a sideways motion, then repeat with the other leg, all while still bouncing up and down, swinging your arms, and wiggling your hips.

Pink tries to imitate all of that at once... and trips, falling flat on her face.

“Pink!” you shout.

Cringing, she picks herself up and dusts herself off. Before you can ask her if she’s alright, she goes right back to trying to dance - a little more awkwardly than you do, slower than you’re used to, but with an enthusiasm that can’t be beat.

Before you’ve even realized it, the two of you are facing each other, dancing as one. You do different dances, and she follows them quickly - spinning your hips in a circle with your arms raised over your head, knocking your feet together with them both pointing outwards, crouching down and crossing your arms and legs over each other.

You’re having so much fun, and you can tell Pink is too. The two of you are grinning at each other in a way the other Diamonds definitely wouldn’t approve of, and defying them only makes it that much better.

Maybe that’s why you get closer and closer. Maybe that’s why Pink lowers herself more and more to your height. Maybe that’s why the two of you come face to face.

Maybe that’s why her lips press against yours, and there’s a white-hot glow that forms around your gems and your bodies, and just for a second, it isn’t you and her but just _her, _four-armed and four-eyed and so perfect, so right, like it was _meant to be_...

And then you split apart, thrown aside from her, the two of you falling on your backs.

“Pink!” you shout. “Oh, gosh, that was... that was amazing! What _was_ that?!”

Pink doesn’t answer. She raises herself off the ground, stands up, and walks away, towards the Warp Pad.

“Pink?” you repeat, more quietly. You feel like you should follow, but you’re still shocked.

She turns around and gazes at you over her shoulder before stepping onto the Warp Pad and disappearing into the stars.

You can’t understand why she isn’t smiling too.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

One day among the millenia, Pink brings a servant to the garden. A “Pearl,” you know, although you’ve only ever actually seen Blue and Yellow’s Pearls. This one has hair in spirals, the same way you can make spirals with your body, and has a form far more fanciful than any you’ve ever possessed.

You immediately hate her, because Pink clearly loves her. She laughs with the Pearl. She jokes with the Pearl. She plays games with the Pearl like she plays with you, even going so far as to juggle balls for the Pearl... which only makes you angrier, because that’s _your _trick!

You try to upstage the Pearl by outperforming her. You tell better jokes than ever, you make even sillier faces, you contort your body in every way you know how and then some, you literally drag Pink away from the Pearl just so you can get just a little more of her attention. But the Pearl dogs your every step, constantly at Pink’s side.

By the time the day is over, you’re sullen and sitting in the corner of the garden and there’s something wet rolling down your cheeks. You hate it. You hate the Pearl. You hate Pink. You hate _everything._

That’s why you’re happy when, the next time Pink brings a servant, it’s a different Pearl, one with a long nose and a large, round gem on her forehead.

You think about the other Pearl being replaced and feel far better. You don’t know why she was replaced, of course, but you figure it’s what she deserves for cavorting so openly with _your _Pink.

This time, you think, won’t let anyone stand between the two of you.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

If you hated the first Pearl, you _despise _the second one.

Pink is always bringing her, and they’re stuck together like glue. They play all the time, doing who-the-heck-knows-what, and _you _barely get any attention anymore. Whenever you try to butt in, Pink doesn’t smile at your antics - she frowns at you, she narrows her eyes at you, she looks annoyed at you. It just makes you hate the new Pearl _more._

One day, you’ve had enough. This is _your _Garden. This is _your _Pink. This dumb Pearl doesn’t have the relationship that you and Pink have. This dumb Pearl hasn’t known Pink for _thousands of years _like you have! You don’t deserve to be tossed aside like some common gem!

You wait until Pink is distracted talking to Blue and Yellow on the communicator and snake your way over to the Pearl’s side.

“Leave Pink alone,” you whisper.

“What? Why?” says the Pearl, glancing at you.

“I’m her best friend. Her _only _best friend. Got it?” You narrow your eyes. “She’s mine.”

“Well, I’m afraid I can’t do that,” says the Pearl, still without directly looking at you. “It’s my sworn duty to be at my Diamond’s side at all times to serve her as she sees fit.”

“Oh? _Oh? _Sworn duty to serve, huh? Is that why you’ve been _playing_ with her? Having _fun? _Dare I say, _cavorting?”_

“C-cavorting?” the Pearl sputters, coughing. Her cheeks turn blue, and that just makes you more mad than you are already. “I have no idea as to what you’re referring to.”

“How about this? Pearl and Pink sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” you say, pulling down your eyelid and sticking out your tongue. “Don’t you _dare_ deny it!”

The Pearl’s face turns even more blue. “I would never-!”

“She’s mine!” you repeat, and you’re yelling now. You start to jump up and down, stomping on the flowers beneath your feet. “Mine, mine, mine!”

You eventually realize Pink is staring at you, and that instead of the smiles you treasure so much, her face is a deep-set frown. You’ve never seen her look so... _disappointed._

“I... I...” you stammer. Your vision blurs, your eyes becoming wet. You know you’re about to burst, and part of you wonders why the Diamonds gave gems the ability to cry in the first place. “I’m... sorry. I’m sorry.”

Pink says nothing. She only walks away, once again, her Pearl following close behind. Her Pearl stares in confusion at you as she passes. You want to punch her, but even you’re smart enough to know that’d just make things worse.

You don’t see the Pearl again.

* * *

You wait.

* * *

Pink still comes to visit you after that, but she doesn’t laugh anymore, not really. She doesn’t smile, not really. When she does, it never meets her eyes, and it fades just as fast.

You don’t dare to bring up that time you danced together, or whatever it was that had happened then. You don’t dare to bring up that Pearl, not even to say sorry, which you know you should do. You just try to be entertaining and fun and happy, in the hopes that things will just go back to normal all by themselves.

It’s not long before your hopes are rebuilt.

Pink gets a communication from the Diamonds, telling her that she’s been granted a new colony. You literally jump for joy - you’re so excited! You’re not just happy for her, but excited for a new start, a fresh start, a new place to play.

Maybe she’ll be happy again there.

Maybe she’ll spend time with you again there.

You follow her, for the first time in thousands of years, as she walks to the Warp Pad, but she keeps stopping and halting you. You don’t know why. You don’t understand at all. Aren’t you going to the new colony too?

At last, Pink turns to you. She stops, crouches down, and smiles.

“Here in the garden, let’s play a game. I’ll show you how it’s done...”

* * *

You wait.

* * *

It’s so hard for you, not moving - harder than anything. You’re used to bouncing and flipping and wobbling and stretching, defying even physics herself to stop you from doing the impossible. Not moving goes against everything that makes you _you._

But when your diamond - your Pink - tells you to stand perfectly still, you do. After all, what else would you do? It’s not as if there’s anything she asked of you that you _wouldn’t_ do.

And it’s just a game, you tell yourself, as the years become decades, as the decades become centuries, as the centuries become millenia. Any day now, any minute now, she’ll be back, and you’ll play again, and gosh, she’ll be _so _disappointed in you if you’ve moved!

You can’t stand the thought of her being disappointed in you. Not again.

So...

You wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Ivy and Willow for looking at this fic and giving me feedback!


End file.
